I’m posting a follow-up to yesterday’s blog of self-pity. I’m done. Thanks for listening.
I’ve been wondering today – when are we entitled to wallow in our own misery (sometimes, when we don’t even have anything significant to be miserable about), and when is it time to just stop talking and let it go?
When I broke my ankle last fall, I had a few conversations with friends who were feeling quite sorry for me. And honestly, I really wasn’t feeling sorry for myself, so it seemed kind of ridiculous to me, and actually made me a little uncomfortable. I was able to maintain perspective – that my injury was temporary and not life-threatening. But after a year of some pain on most days, I think I just lost that perspective for a while.
Really, all it took was a conversation with a friend yesterday to put that perspective right back into my face, when she told me that I had every right to be feeling a bit sorry for myself, when faced with pain and a decision about having a third surgery. You see, this friend has a chronic medical condition, and even though I haven’t known her for long, I’ve never heard her complain once about her own situation.
And that was enough for me. Bam. There was my perspective.
I don’t think it’s about finding our perspective by seeking out someone who has it worse. I think it’s about realizing that we ALL have our struggles, and how we get through life is about the lens through which we view these struggles. And some days, it’s okay to curl yourself into a ball and wallow in a little self-pity (or in my case, try and shake off the self-pity by cruising through the aisles of Christmas Tree Shops, looking for Halloween decorations. And FYI, that worked, but not for long). But most days, you’re going to feel a whole lot better when you realize that we all have it tough in one way or another, so talk to a friend, hug your dog, and then step out into the world.
Just try not to break your ankle when you do.