Uncategorized

The Five Stages of Coronavirus Quarantine.

HOARDING

Unless you’re good at estimating your potential toilet paper usage over the course of a quarantine of yet-to-be-determined length, you probably don’t have enough. Or you have too much. I don’t think anyone is in the in-between group.

The last time we picked up takeout, our 14-year-old grabbed about 10 packets of soy sauce. Why? “We might need them.” If anyone needs soy sauce, I’ve got you covered.

And for some reason, now that hoarding tendencies have subsided a bit and people are accepting this as their new normal, our local supermarkets have most things available now. Except for chicken. I’m still seeking an explanation.

HYPOCHONDRIA

Is it hot in here? Or cold? What was that cough?

EXCESSIVE CLEANING

I’ve been grocery shopping for myself and my family for more than 20 years. Yesterday was the first time I’d ever washed a banana.

ANGER

Really??! Someone posted this morning in a mom’s Facebook group that she needs a photographer to capture her one-year-old’s “smash cake” session? That’s a frivolous request under the BEST circumstances.

ACCEPTANCE

Well, we’re probably in this for the long haul, so it’s time to get creative. We’ve been playing board games, cooking and going for walks with our two teenage sons. Under “normal” circumstances, this isn’t something that would likely be happening with any regularity. We’re taking our social distancing seriously, and I’ll take whatever good I can find in this situation.

Stay safe. Be well. Wash your hands.

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parenting, Uncategorized

The Coronavirus Diaries: Part I

Welp. Coronavirus is officially a pandemic.

The university where I teach has moved to online classes for the remainder of the semester. My son, who goes to college in Virginia, is home for what’s now an extended spring break, and will resume classes online until at least early April.

The high school where my younger son is a freshman has closed “indefinitely” after today, which means once he gets home this afternoon, I’m guessing he won’t be putting pants back on for a while. I’m actually most worried about him, because he was already complaining yesterday that there are no sports on TV. And it was just the first of what I can only predict will be many days of college and pro sports being suspended.

And I’ve discovered that I have what some might call a hoarding tendency. My pantry is full and I’ve created an overflow area in a basement closet. I’ve bought toilet paper three times in the last week. And for some reason I came home with three tubes of toothpaste on Wednesday. I even went to the liquor store, because even though I’m not exactly a big drinker, I think the chances of becoming one will increase the longer this goes on.

I sent my husband to buy some of the cold medicine you have to show your driver’s license for. When he texted me from CVS to ask what size box to get, I told him the biggest. If we do get sick, we’re prepared. If we don’t get sick but we do get bored, we can potentially open a meth lab.

Stay tuned. Wash your hands.

 

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