HOARDING

Unless you’re good at estimating your potential toilet paper usage over the course of a quarantine of yet-to-be-determined length, you probably don’t have enough. Or you have too much. I don’t think anyone is in the in-between group.

The last time we picked up takeout, our 14-year-old grabbed about 10 packets of soy sauce. Why? “We might need them.” If anyone needs soy sauce, I’ve got you covered.

And for some reason, now that hoarding tendencies have subsided a bit and people are accepting this as their new normal, our local supermarkets have most things available now. Except for chicken. I’m still seeking an explanation.

HYPOCHONDRIA

Is it hot in here? Or cold? What was that cough?

EXCESSIVE CLEANING

I’ve been grocery shopping for myself and my family for more than 20 years. Yesterday was the first time I’d ever washed a banana.

ANGER

Really??! Someone posted this morning in a mom’s Facebook group that she needs a photographer to capture her one-year-old’s “smash cake” session? That’s a frivolous request under the BEST circumstances.

ACCEPTANCE

Well, we’re probably in this for the long haul, so it’s time to get creative. We’ve been playing board games, cooking and going for walks with our two teenage sons. Under “normal” circumstances, this isn’t something that would likely be happening with any regularity. We’re taking our social distancing seriously, and I’ll take whatever good I can find in this situation.

Stay safe. Be well. Wash your hands.