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Man down.

I broke my ankle this week.  Unfortunately, there’s a back story …. in October 2012, I missed a step in my house, and dislocated and broke my ankle.  I spent a weekend in the hospital to have some hardware put in, and had two subsequent surgeries in 2013.  The last one, to remove the hardware, was just in December.

On Monday, the dog kind of wrapped herself up in the backyard, and I ducked outside to help her.  A lot of the snow has melted, and unfortunately, there was one small patch (and I mean SMALL –  probably no more than about 10 inches square) of ice on our patio.  I slipped on it, fell and twisted my ankle.  I thought it was sprained, but took myself for an x-ray, and they told me it’s actually broken, the same bone as before.

Yesterday I went to see an ankle specialist, who told me I need yet another surgery to repair this break.  It should be sometime in the next few days.

I’m incredibly upset.  Sad, pissed, and defeated.  But I realized I’m probably not as depressed as I’d originally thought, because when I finally got out of bed this morning and dragged myself into the shower (lucky for us, we still have a shower chair from last time – yay?), I figured I should shave my legs, because it might be awhile before I’ll have access to that left one again.

So, as much as I’m inclined right now to wallow in self-pity, I decided that a more productive exercise would be to try and find the positives in what is generally just a lousy situation:

1- I can probably wear really comfy yoga pants every day for the next 6-8 weeks, and because I will be on crutches and have my leg in a big cast, nobody will judge me.

2- I won’t have to pick up any of the dog’s poop for the foreseeable future.

3- I broke my left ankle, which means I can still drive.  Thankfully, I never did master driving a stick, because then I’d be screwed.

4- Automatic upper-body workout.  A person can get some nice triceps by dragging their sorry behind up the steps, if they do it right.

5- Lots of hugs from my boys.

6- Adorable, unbridled 8-year-old enthusiasm about helping me make lunches, getting dinner ready, and just generally keeping the house together.  And that adorable face insisting on bringing me my crutches, and telling me that he needs to sleep in my room tonight because Dave is away overnight and someone needs to keep an eye on me.

7- An inability to spend too much time wallowing in self-pity, because my kids are intermittently upset about their mom being hurt, and I want them to know that we’ll all be okay.

8- Amazing friends and family, who have stepped up and offered to help again (even though they just saw my family through this 16 months ago), and will hopefully continue to help me keep things in perspective with humor.  One friend warned me to look over my shoulder because it seems that someone is out to get me.  Another called me a drama queen for breaking my ankle only to upstage a serious illness that she’s facing.  Two others have already dropped off meals to sustain us.

9- A rare few hours, just me and my dad, because he’s the one of my parents who seems to have lost the coin toss and drove 45 minutes to accompany me to pre-surgical appointments today.  Somehow, I was able to get through all the medical stuff in just an hour and a half, and was able to enjoy a lunch out, just me and my dad – also pretty rare.

So, here’s my plan – I’m going to try my best to keep this in perspective (sure, it kind of sucks to break your ankle twice in 16 months and have 4 surgeries on the same joint in less than 2 years, but it’s still no more life-threatening than it was the first time).  I’m going to do my best to find the humor when and where I can.  And I’m hoping my friends, neighbors and family won’t get bored of giving us a hand here and there when we need it.

Wish me luck.

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